The Talk

Come. 

Sit down.

Shut the door and leave the world outside.

You see, 

There are a few things

That have been on my mind;

I'm pretty sure they've been on yours as well.

So, 

Put down what you're doing.

Set your work aside,

Forget your duties for a while

And sit next to me.

Oh, 

And when you come,

Remember to close the door

And leave the world on the other side.

Downtime

With the seemingly endless madness of the daily rat race where we run from one obligation to the next, there comes a point when we all need to just stop for a moment and breathe. Just a few minutes where seriousness, responsibility and all the other not-so-fun things that come with being an adult can take a back seat to pure, unadulterated silliness can sometimes make all the difference between staying balanced and having a full-out meltdown.

One of the things I enjoy doing when I have a little downtime is cracking up while watching a good parody- anything from classic sketch shows like In Living Color, MADtv or Saturday Night Live to vloggers like Glozell Green. There's just nothing quite like a bit of comedy to remind you not to take life quite so seriously all the time. I recently came across the Key of Awesome series on Youtube that does some great spoofs so I figured I'd share the laughs. Here are a couple of my favourites (so far).

Adele ft. Angry Birds

Rihanna: We Found Love in a Homeless Place

Gentle Arousal

The first rays break through the dark

Dissolving the walls of solid black with hopeful light.

The air is fresh, unsullied as yet;

The silence, untainted with sound-

A blank canvas

Awaiting the first tender stroke

Of the Artist's humble brush.

As the radiance steals over land and river and sea,

Colours peep out from under blankets of grey 

And stretch their limbs over their surroundings,

Drawing the world out of drowse

And into a vigilent state,

Awakening sight and sound,

Arousing smell and taste.

Restoring feeling and thought.

And night gives way to day.

Sexual Healing Suite 4: Student Application

Take my hand

Be my guide

Light the path that leads inside
The space
Where I can find 
The key to understanding
The elusive contents of your mind.

With a little patience,

You'll see that I'll prove

A willing student,

A docile dove, 

Ready to learn 

The ways of love.

Sexual Healing Suite 3: Physical Geography

Mmm...

Damn! 

You sure put it down tonight.

Your hands,

Your hips,

Your thighs,

Your lips,

Your... mmm

You pulled some tricks out of...

I can't imagine where.

The way you felt,

The way you moved,

The way you smelt,

The way you touched me , 

The things you said...

I sure learned some things tonight.

You taught me how 

To take my time,

To explore, 

To savour,

To tease,

To coax... 

Mmm hmmm...

You brought out some things...

A passion that was new to me,

Ardour-filled discovery.

And together 

We romped,

We rolled,

We played,

We let each other's love unfold...

Ooh baby!

Tonight a whole 'notha world just opened up.

A world of fresh sights,

And tastes,

 And sounds,

A world where mountains,

Valleys and fountains abound.

You put it down last night!

When we connected,

The click was almost audible;

The electricity was palpable;

The emotion breathable;

The ecstasy edible.

Mmm, mmm, mmm!

Baby,

Stay a little while longer.

Let me lose myself in those eyes.

Bedazzle me with that smile.

Let me lie in the warmth of your touch.

Let me wander across the landscape of your body.

And explore the recesses of you

For just a little bit...

Sexual Healing Suite 2: One Night Ninja

Last night you touched me.

It felt like a dream.

So euphoric and surreal,

I just couldn't believe 

It could really be happening.

How funny it seems,

That I find myself questioning

If it was all real.

'Cause now in the daylight

With no body of truth,

The only evidence remaining -

 A vague semblance of proof - 

Is the crinkle in the sheets

On the side of the bed

Where my poor, befuddled head

Tells me you must have slept.

And I curse myself 

For not perceiving you in your stealth,

As silently you crept

Out of the room

And into the night,

Cautiously making your way 

Back to your life.

Sexual Healing Suite 1: Celibacy Black and Blues

This lady sang a song

Bemoaning her sad state,

The blues of a circumstantial celibacy 

That had come to be her fate.

I, for one, have never been bothered 

By lack of activity on that account,

And to me these matters seemed 

No great trial to surmount.

But lately there's this nagging feeling

Pulling at my mind.

And though I push it out the way,

It just won't stay on the side.

I've tried the homemade remedies,

The showers tinged with ice

But they just mock my efforts

And tighten up the vice.

See sometimes a body needs a body

To hold them through the night:

To kiss.

To hug.

To make sweet love

 Until embraced so tight,

Together you reach the height 

Of  lovers' bliss

On the wings of pure delight;

Then fall asleep, well content,

To the rhythm of their caresses,

And wake to see the golden dawn

Reflected in their tresses. 

So here I find myself a victim of this celibacy

And Jill, I feel you girl

'Cause this thing here, is really workin' on me...