The two of us share a history
Or, shall we say,
A checkered past?
We got along so awkwardly
I'm not surprised
Things fell apart.
We existed in each other's space
No more, no less
And somehow I just accepted it;
Told myself it was for the best.
I was hurt by you.
Felt estranged from you.
Abandoned.
You were the enemy.
The intruder.
The invader who
Had no business in my territory
Trying to bring law and order.
So I rebelled.
I used fire.
I raised hell.
But you weren't afraid
And you pushed back;
Asserted your claim.
So I gave up.
Retreated into myself.
Let my garden turn into a wilderness.
Shut myself up in a cave.
Packed myself in ice,
Thinking that would cool the flame.
Took no account of global warming
Or the fact things move in cyclical waves.
Now my winter forteress has melted
And I'm burning again.
So the only way to stop this cycle,
The only way to break this curse
Is to shift gears; move into reverse
And go back to the place
Where I should have started first.
Only time doesn't work like that.
You can never go back.
Least that's what I've learnt about the past:
You can't change it.
You don't get a do-over.
You remember it.
Until you don't
Because it no longer matters.
But it does to me
And therein lies the problem.
So I've returned to you
For a healthy side of crow.
And I can't predict how this will end,
This only do I know:
You can't pull a relationship out of thin air.
You can't get back what never was.
But you've gotta start somewhere.
