Yes saying,
Over bending,
Bowing and scraping
For fear of hurting,
Of offending.
Knowing all the while
These grand benevolent gestures,
While the outworking of genuine inclination,
Go against the grain
Of what my heart desires.
Tug at the reins,
Get me out of bed.
Foot dragging,
Smile faking,
Anger suppressing,
Self denigrating,
Late arriving,
Phone call dodging...
Purely coincidental,
Or essentially symptomatic
Of a deeper ailment?
Guilty conscience tears away
At the fibre of my soul.
Laughter and joviality feigned and forced
Become a greater chore.
Want to run and hide away
Leave responsibility in the dust-
Oh to conform!
To give whole heartedly!
To be full and true!
Get past this insanity
Free to be me entirely!
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