Wild Side

It's a beautiful day 

To take a walk on the wild side.

What a day,

A lovely day

To take a walk on the wild side.

I didn't know I could feel this way,

Throw all my worries and concerns away.

I had no idea I could feel this way,
Shelf the drama and go out and play.

It's such a glorious day

And I'm walking on the wild side.

Are you feeling like 

You've missed your last chance?

Are you thinking about 

All the stuff in your past?

Forget your blues, 

Pump the electro 

And dance.

It's such a glorious day

For you to step out

And take a walk 

On the wild side.

Don't be afraid.

Today's the day

To start walking on the wild side.

Fantasy Finale

I used to watch you

From a distance

And wish I could 

Summon up the courage

To tell you that I would

Like to take you out

On a coffee date,

Or a long walk

Where we'd talk 

Until daybreak.

But no matter how hard I tried

To draw your attention

You never seemed to notice me,

Never gave me any mention.

I tried all kinds of strategies

To get you off my mind,

Short of going down to the local  pub

And drinking myself blind.

To no avail.

I couldn't keep my thoughts 

From straying back to you.

No matter what I said, or where I went 

Or what I tried to do,

I couldn't change the fact 

That what it always came down to

Was me wanting to love 

And be loved by you.

Today I've finally managed

To gather up my strength

At last I have discovered

The way to break your spell.
And for my emotional health

I learned how to cut off this obsession

Without betraying myself.

Today, I choose to let you go

Though you never asked a thing of me.

Today, I choose to give you up

With no hate or animosity.

I choose to leave this thing behind

That demands so much energy.
And take the time 
To occupy my life with things of necessity

These choices let me free myself 
From all this useless pain.

So I can learn, and heal and grow...

And, one day, 
Be free to love again.

Divestment

It's time...

For all the years spent trying:

Be stalwart, be calm,

Patient and kind,

Yet ever armed;

Be wise and subtle,

Be firm and yet humble;

Be genuine but know how to fake,

Bend like the green willow but never break;

Never let them see behind your game face... 

All the while knowingly lying

For the sake of conforming

To social grace.

The walls I built with reinforced steel

Turned into a prison that would not yield

Even to my hand, 

When, at last a man,

I came to understand

That in weakness there can be strength

In awkwardness, stealth

And underneath poverty, untold wealth.

When at last I opened my eyes

Finally beginning to realise

That I'd read the signs wrong

That I'd been brainwashed all along

Into thinking I needed to kill

All the while amassing debt in an unpayable bill,

Keeping me enslaved, effacing my will;

Leaving me numb, soulless and ill

But demanding more and even more still...

So I decided

It's time:

Time to let go

Time to strip off all the masks and pretense and ego

Time to look into the mirror and finally know

What's really there so I can undergo

The metamorphosis that must inevitably follow...

Time to put all I've learnt to the test.

Time to come face to face with my best.

Time to be strong and leave fear powerless.  

Time to be vulnerable, not time to hide.

And at the edge of this decision, I cried.

Shameless...

Overweight

A jaunty saunter,

And saucy swagger

Up to the checkout desk

Belies nagging doubt

About what the scales will read

Under the weight of all my baggage.

It really wasn’t my fault.

You see,

What had happened was

I had so many important things to bring along:

My knowledge for starters,

Such wealth as I possess,

Then there was pride and self confidence

(Packed a little extra in my carry-on too),

Oh, and there are those residual hurts

Mementos from obscure episodes in my past,

Of course, I had to make space for complacency and doubt,

My talent, my ingenuity,

Self pity, helpless feelings and anxieties-

No way I could leave those behind!

So I bussed it,

Hoofed it,

Hobbled and taxied

All the way here

And now my bags are starting to tell:

There are some broken straps and handles,

Not to mention a couple of busted zippers

But dammit I made it!

But passing through

the million and one security checks along the way,

(Damn those bloody terrorists!)

I find I’m forced to sort through my affairs

And leave little odds and ends behind:

A mask here,

A worn out excuse there,

Old padding and protections,

Scarves and coats I’d taken as a precaution

But most likely won’t need at my destination.

Still,

Even after all these checks

My bags are still so loaded

I can barely drag them along.

I fear that between check-in

And the remaining security stations,

I’ll have no choice

But to cast more and more stuff aside,

So that by the time I reach the gate for boarding

They’ll have me stripped down to nothing

But the bare essentials

Cause this airline don’t give you no allowance for overweight.